May 102017
 

Are you Aldi people? We’re Aldi people. The experience is a little odd, but once you get used to it, there are a lot of killer deals within.

You have to be careful, though. Most of the offerings are of high quality, but there are a few duds there too—even, occasionally, within a range of products. For example, with Willow toilet paper at Aldi, you must select “Ultra Premium” (on the right side of this photograph).

The Ultra Premium is as fine as any toilet paper you have ever used. You’ll hear a faint trumpet fanfare when you unroll it, and when you apply it, you’ll just barely believe it’s not linen.

The “Essential,” on the left side of the photograph, could be a traveler through time and space, visiting us from 1978 East Germany. It is thin, rough, and harsh, like a meth-addicted hooker. Even the thought of donating it makes me feel guilty. It may just have to go to the landfill.

Choose wisely.

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