My friend Terri sent me the remarkable story of this man today. Go read it for yourself, for sure. He has a lot to say about his situation.
Basically, he is a black man being ridiculed and degraded for a photograph he sent into the wild. It shows him holding one child while fixing the hair of another.
I’ve been thinking about a post series for some time. Essentially, its theme is things that shouldn’t be controversial but are. Late-term abortion is on the list. Suspicion of government is on the list.
I think this photograph, and reaction to it, is underscoring to me that the phrase “acting white” needs to be part of that series.
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That post brought to mind a couple of things for me:
-The relation to “code switching” where black people find that they must change how they speak in order to be accepted / not hassled. For instance, “ask” instead of “ax”.
http://www.npr.org/blogs/codeswitch/2013/12/03/248515217/why-chaucer-said-ax-instead-of-ask-and-why-some-still-do
-The general attitude that fathers cannot stay home with their kids without being lazy / pedophiles / not a man / etc. And the flip argument that any man who so much as lifts a finger around the house is a hero to be celebrated and worshiped. He’s right, a photo of a woman doing this would be ignored. And people think feminism is just for women. *snort*
I’m not sure I’m clear on where you’re coming from.
I’m saying the assignment of novelty to this photograph and the behavior it depicts is a significant liability and needs to be done away with. Are we agreeing?
It’s disheartening how dearly we cling to stereotypes; racial, gender, or other. The back lash, I believe, is partly attributed to people wanting this man to confirm their prejudice so they can maintain feelings of superiority. Some of it is simply deflection to soothe the shame felt for not being a good parent. He’s getting it from both sides, and it’s a sad statement on how far we have to go.
By the way, I think that a man taking care of his kids is about as sexy as it gets. He’s a good guy.
Offense because he refuses to validate a held prejudice? Interesting idea. That had not occurred to me quite so succinctly. Thank you, Cheryl!