Life has been good to me, and I think it’s important to give back from time to time. So, in the spirit of giving that permeates everything I do at BoWilliams.com, here are six habits to avoid to help you stay healthy:
- Pick your nose. It seems somewhat obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people miss this one. Not only can you create sites that are prone to infection, but if you’ve been sick, you risk reinfecting yourself if you eat it.
- Chew used gum. It’s not a good idea to put gum that you find under furniture or on the street in your mouth, even if you’re certain the sun has baked it enough to kill any pathogens, and no matter what yummy flavor you think it might be. Resist the urge.
- Lick the wall. Yes, it can be tempting. Just say no. All kinds of creepy-crawlies can live on walls for hours—sometimes days—after initial depositing.
- Eat food out of trashcans. Wow, only two bites gone from that chili dog! Score! But, you shouldn’t. Maybe it didn’t taste quite right to the person who threw it away, you know? You could be risking botulism.
- Use a doctor who works out of a minivan. It does make a lot of sense when he tells you he’s saving overhead by having no physical plant. But it’s a tad unsettling to have him tell you the third row will afford you sufficient privacy for your urine specimen, isn’t it?
- Shop hookers strictly on price. No telling what she’ll do, but also no telling what Mr. Happy will pick up. Eat ramen for a couple of weeks if you have to, but this is not the place to economize.
It’s important that we each take charge of our well-being. Fortunately, we can accomplish a great deal of good just following a few basic guidelines, like the ones above. To your health!
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It wasn’t a pick. It was a scratch.
So the 5-second rule applies to trashcan food?
I understand, kemtee! No worries. Heh. 😉
Miria, I’m not a big five-second rule person. I will say that if I drop it at home, I generally eat it off the floor. There, I said it. Judge away, masses.
I feel fairly confident that I’m immune to my boogers. Now, eating another person’s boogers — that should be avoided at all cost. 🙂
Are there any more cooties exchanged than when you, say, French kiss another person? I sort of doubt it. It’s just aesthetics. 🙂
Yeah, cause those high dollar hookers are totally immune to the STDs. Right.
Carol, of course they aren’t, but I’d think they’d be more likely to take care of themselves when they’re pulling down several thousand a night.
I can’t believe what hookers cost. Even the ShamWow guy paid $1,000. Wow, that seems like a lot.
I would like to know why dudes pay dollars for something they could get for free.