Major League Baseball today announced sweeping and irrevocable disqualifications for thousands of players, past and present, who have tested positive for steroids. The disqualifications invalidate any individual records the players have held.
Consequently, the new home run king is journeyman third baseman Ken Oberkfell, with 29 round-trippers in his 16-year career. Oberkfell is perhaps best remembered as a member of the 1982 World Champion St. Louis Cardinals.
In related news, reports that the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum would be relocating to Pinedale Square on Route 5, between the Little Caesar’s and the dry cleaners, could not be immediately confirmed.
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Malcolm “Outliers” Gladwell had a good point in one of his articles about a year ago. He said he’s not against banning steroids, but that we should be able to give a hard and fast simple reason why steroids are banned but other performance enhancements are not. Like, maybe we shouldn’t allow players to have laser eye surgery or wear contact lenses…corrective eye procedures artificially inflate the batting average of a LOT of players…as long as we’re striving for all-natural athletic talent on the field, ban the guys with corrective lenses, too! 😉
JoeC: I’m digging that line of thinking very much. How far could you take it? “No sir, you can’t have that high fiber, lowfat breakfast, as proper eating has been determined to be an unfair advantage. Cram this Krispy Kreme in your maw.”
Harrison Bergeron, anyone?
I’ve definitely got to check out more Vonnegut novels…haven’t read Harrison Bergeron, but from the description at Wiki-true-or-not-pedia, it sounds like a must-read.
Good news: it’s a short story, and the whole thing is here, though I doubt legally:
http://instruct.westvalley.edu/lafave/hb.html
It’s one of my favorites.
Thanks! Was just about to add it to the weread books I wanna read list, and came back here looking for the title, and ended up reading it. Vonnegut was a genius. Good story…