Jul 062016
 

This is one of my favorite photographs. It’s a self-portrait of Tracy Caldwell Dyson aboard the International Space Station in 2010, two weeks before she came home.

image

Tracy Caldwell Dyson, who would have so totally been my girlfriend except that we grew up on opposite sides of the country and did completely different things, has an impressive resume. (Astronauts generally do.) What I like about this photo (besides the subject’s substantial comeliness) is that it shows her relaxed and reflective, with the greatest view any human being anywhere at that single moment had. But she didn’t get to have this moment without bleeding, sweating, and crying for it. This moment existed because she never gave up.

It costs a lot to take a photograph this cool.

 Posted by at 11:08 am
Jun 222016
 

Gumby and Pokey have been on every desk I’ve had since I first starting getting paid as a writer, in early 1994.

I suppose I hope they convey that I don’t take myself too seriously. I guess they occasionally fall into my view when I need a little levity. I’ve offered them up for little children to play on Take Your Child to Work Day. But mostly, they just sit there.

gumbypokey

Well, they have except for the last few months I was at Intergraph.

Over the course of perhaps my last six months, I would occasionally arrive at work in the morning to find Gumby and Pokey…posed. They bent lots of different ways, and my anonymous jokester found them all.

The first time, the pose was fairly tame. They progressed (regressed?) rapidly into every single sexual position I ever imagined, and a few I hadn’t. (After all, I’m not in the habit of considering a quadruped in such musings.) Some mornings, they were so good I had to stop and have a good laugh before I even logged in. Alas, these were the days before everyone had a camera with them all the time.

I never did find out who did it. But, sir/ma’am, if you’re reading, I certainly did enjoy your work. Thanks for thinking of me.

 Posted by at 7:15 am
May 312016
 

Oh, I loved you so, Windows Phone. I was certain we’d be happy together forever. To be fair, there were minor issues from the start, but we either minimized or worked through them together, as young couples should. However, when we began to have serious problems, I consistently felt more committed to the relationship than […]

 Posted by at 12:07 pm
Feb 062016
 

(Note: As of June 2016, the Chisel Shave Club appears to have folded.) I heard from the Chisel Shave Club folks about a month ago. Lauren, a member of their press team, had seen my Harry’s reviews and asked if I’d be interested in trying traditional wet shaving with their products. I replied and let […]

 Posted by at 10:12 am

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