Jan 262015

In the spring of 1989, at UAH in my Introduction to Philosophy class, there was a girl named Carol whose eyes were the greenest, most lustrous things I’ve ever seen. They were pools of molten emerald.

She sat several rows over and slightly further forward, so we’d have opportunities for eye contact as Dr. Cling would lecture. I let her catch me looking at her a few times over the course of a couple of weeks. I finally got up the nerve to keep looking back when she looked at me, and got a little reaction out of her.

I can remember Carol’s little smile and slight eyebrow raise even today and feel funny inside.

The 43-year-old me understands that a word after class is next. “Hey, want to get some coffee?” Even the 20-year-old me knew and was good with that.

The 18-year-old me quivered with pleasure at the positive reinforcement, and then promptly did nothing with it.


Obviously it all worked out. This is not a lament. I remembered it though because of this morning’s 95.1 banter, as well as a recent Kelly Kazek piece. It seems that today, in these missed-opportunity situations, you’re supposed to write a Craigslist ad describing the interaction and hope she a) reads it; b) recognizes herself in the description; c) finds it more intriguing than creepy; and d) actually follows it up with contact.

That seems like an awfully steep mountain to climb.

Guys, you have to talk to her. If you don’t, someone else will in a similar circumstance. Step with confidence, make eye contact again, smile, and go.

Work on your sense of humor. Making her laugh will get you 20 to 30 seconds of attention from nearly any woman (and almost certainly any woman you’d want to hang with). Self-deprecation, in moderation, is a promising vein of ore here.

Just please don’t walk away and then write a goofy lament to the universe.

Anyone know of one of these ads ever working (in real life, not a movie or book)? If so, let me hear from you.

 Posted by at 10:00 am
Jan 212015

You don’t have to read BoWilliams.com long to know that I’m a regular Rocket City Mom contributor. It’s a site of considerable quality, and I’m proud of my association.

I posted about Jennifer and Stephenie, the original Rocket City Moms, taking us contributors out to a marvelous and entertaining dinner just before Christmas. It was a nice thing they did, but it was also an event because they were both actually in the same room with me. They’re crazy busy, and that just doesn’t happen often. Stephenie is my editor so I try to see her in person every few months or so, and I never know it’s going to happen for sure until I see her walk in the door. You know those kinds of busy people?

steph6So after dinner, Jennifer and I were walking to our cars, talking about the site, mass media, and so forth. Stephenie caught up to us and joined the conversation. Then she said “look! This is Caleb’s new car.”

Jen and I looked at either quizzically. Steph was standing next to a six-year-old Toyota Corolla.

The car was in fine condition, but we’re talking about maybe a $7000 ride—nothing you’d be embarrassed to drive to work, but nothing you’d call specific attention to in the Westin parking lot either.

So…I guess we need to find a compliment?

“Oh, wait…” (Stephenie looked around.)

It seems we were looking for something of similar color, but newer, and German. She’d made a spatial error. Ah. Here it is. Yes, indeed. Quite sharp. And are you sure you’re OK to drive, Steph?

(She was.)

I’ve enjoyed remembering it so much and deemed it postworthy for two reasons. One is that it was the first funny little just-us-chickens moment I’ve ever had with Jennifer. The other is that Stephenie is so smart and so together so much of the time that there’s something comforting about that slight malfunction!

Warm wishes, Stephenie. And I’m sure you’ll get even!

 Posted by at 7:56 pm

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