Sep 232016

Can you handle this upcoming political theater? I’m not sure I can.

Monday night’s presidential debate figures to be one of the single most entertaining and unpredictable political events of the past 50 years or so. Trying to script in advance how this is going to go—well, let’s just get the proverbial hundred monkeys and hundred typewriters and see what happens. (Kids, this link included in case you don’t know what a typewriter is.)

Lovers of language, would-be pundits, irreverent bloggers—we’re all salivating.

But can we enjoy it knowing?

Can we enjoy it without also sobbing uncontrollably at the fact that one of these tools is going to win?

 Posted by at 11:45 am
Sep 212016

“What we should be doing is much simpler: Chilling the hell out before this gets even more insane than it has already.” – Katherine Timpf


Dear readers, we’re not, you and I, now or anytime soon, going to have an “honest conversation” about or “real look” at or talk about “social justice” for my alleged “microaggressions,” “white privilege,” “mansplaining,” “cultural insensitivity,” or anything else in this vein. (You may have rattled off two or three more that I’m forgetting.)

I don’t have any patience left for this sort of self-styled sociocultural warrior nag who eagerly and repeatedly invites me to consider what prejudices and other shortcomings may lurk in my foul soul, even without me knowing they’re there, because I’m a white male. (Throw Protestant and straight in there too, if you like.)

Mind, it’s not that I couldn’t possibly care about, to some degree, some of the ideas these people raise. It’s that my disgust for their glee in inviting me to consider these alleged character defects now quickly overwhelms any desire I have to carefully examine what they’re saying.

After all, I know that the conscious, overt way I treat people—professionally, personally, however—constitutes (at least) a very large majority of my total behavior toward them, and I further know that it is fine. My enthusiasm for punctilious scolds supposedly zinging me with just how horribly wrong I am, in agonizing, peer-reviewed, hand-wringing detail, is limited.

Perhaps the finger-wagging is so prominent because the story is thin? Didn’t Shakespeare have something to say about that?

To anyone spun up about this kind of thing: I invite you to consider whether you may be minimizing the genuine struggles of rights and privileges people have overcome, particularly in recent history, and to what degree. I further invite you to consider whether there are any other problems—perhaps bigger problems that don’t take so long to explain, and that may have principals besides white men?—that may be worthy of your attention.

And that’s just what I’m going to do here at The overzealous PC hysteria was funny for a while, but there’s really only one joke, and it’s not funny anymore.

 Posted by at 4:17 pm
Sep 192016

Burger King, one-time home of a breakfast sandwich actually called Meatnormous, has decided that Cheetos Chicken Fries should be a thing. They’re strips of fried chicken with a Cheetos coating. No. Just no. Just because two different things are junk food doesn’t mean they go together. I mean, Taco Bell gets this weird synthesis thing […]

 Posted by at 10:56 pm
Sep 132016

Being a generally conservative sort, I’m not a big fan of the endless rush of neologisms our hyperconnectivity has wrought upon our beautiful language. My seething hatred of melty is well-documented, for example, and I’m on record on ginormous as well. I think most of the time, it’s lack of necessity and/or insufficient novelty that […]

 Posted by at 11:37 am is using WP-Gravatar