Mar 242015
 

pain1I picked this up at our local beef jerky/spicy food shop. I’d tried a Most Wanted Pain Is Good sauce or two before, but not the jalapeno. Let’s see what’s going on with it.

The sauce is a pleasant green, tilting toward olive but still in tolerance for a jalapeno sauce, with small pepper and onion bits evident. It’s rather thin. To use it reliably as a dip, look for concavity in the vehicle. (A Tostitos Scoop is good, obviously.) The nose is of mostly peppers and garlic, but vinegar isn’t far behind. What do we have here?

Ingredients: Jalapeno Peppers (Jalapeno Peppers, Water, Vinegar, Salt), Vinegar, Water, Roasted Green Chiles (Green Chiles, Salt, Citric Acid), Onions, Garlic, Lime Juice Concentrate, Natural Thickener (Xanthan Gum, Guar Gum, Sodium Alginate), Spice, Salt, Ascorbic Acid (Vitamin C), Natural Flavor.

Uh-oh. That’s trouble. The first ingredient is clearly canned jalapenos, not fresh. Vinegar and water immediately following aren’t promising developments either.

pain2

And indeed, it’s underwhelming. Straight or on a chip, it starts with a pleasant botanical note, but vinegar quickly overwhelms any subtleties. It doesn’t degrade the snack completely, but the experience is decidedly pedestrian.

It did a little better on a grilled chicken quesadilla. The chicken was marinated in Goya Mojo Criollo, which gave a little sophistication back to the gustatory equation.

pain3

The bottle says it’s medium, at a stated “1,000 to 1,400 Scovilles” [sic]. The heat is right in line with any processed jalapeno product. There’s a little bite that might bug someone who “doesn’t like spicy food.” Chileheads won’t need a drink.

I paid $7.99 for this, which was high. You should be able to find it for $5.50 or so without much problem.

Unfortunately, that’s still too much. This sauce might be marginally defensible priced in line with mass-market offerings. However, it’s a slight but unambiguous failure trying to be a boutique product.

4/10

 Posted by at 10:59 pm
Mar 152015
 

I have never:

  • Driven across the Mississippi River. Every time I’ve been west of the Mississippi, I flew.
  • Eaten tapioca. I just barely know what it is.
  • Seen a James Bond movie from start to finish.
  • ” an episode of M*A*S*H ” ” ” “.
  • Been treated for a broken bone. I broke my right pinkie toe once, but after consulting with a nurse friend decided not to see a doctor.
  • Used an iPhone in any meaningful way. The total time I’ve ever even held one is perhaps 15 minutes, and 10 of those were the first time I ever saw one.
  • Seen a rattlesnake in the wild. I’ve seen a couple of water moccasins and quite a few copperheads.
  • Visited the grave sites of any of my loved ones. That doesn’t bother me. Given that I assign no more importance to a dead person’s body than I do that person’s car or favorite chair, it doesn’t surprise me that it doesn’t bother me.
  • Taken Cowl Shake down. I keep thinking it’ll come to live at BoWilliams.com in one way or another. Just haven’t gotten around to it yet.
  • Been to me. Though, I have been to paradise.
 Posted by at 6:50 pm
Mar 132015
 

I’ve had some long days this week trying to compensate for winter weather absences, so I’m particularly happy to have The Martian as the only item on my to-do list for the next 14 or so hours. Finish a riveting book, and then sleep in? I’ll take it. Awesome. Listen to our broadcast Sunday night. […]

 Posted by at 8:17 pm
Mar 092015
 

It started, perhaps fittingly, with one of my increasingly-infrequent-yet-not-quite-vanquished indulgences of obsessive behavior—in this case, going out in the middle of the night to get a cable that nearly doesn’t exist in the first place. Wal-Mart—the one near County Line on the north side of 72, or maybe “the Jimmy’s Wal-Mart” is a funnier name […]

 Posted by at 8:05 pm

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