Don’t you love when people talk about their feelings, on and on?
I haven’t been writing. Have you noticed? I certainly have. It’s the worst writer’s block I’ve had in the nearly nine years I’ve had BoWilliams.com. Unlike my occasional sabbatical of several days, this is involuntary.
Stress management has been a bugaboo of mine for as long as I’ve been old enough to experience genuine stress. However, I don’t have periodic trouble with it like I used to 15 or 20 years ago. Now, things are great until they aren’t, and when they aren’t they’ve generally been declining for a while without me noticing. So it feels like more of a crash than it should because I’ve been sustainedly inattentive.
I get to this spot (apparently; this is terra incognita) where I can’t write. And it’s not even that I don’t get ideas. It’s more basic than that. I can’t get to the precursor mental state I need for ideas to even be a possibility.
That’s not explained very well, but I’ll go with it.
I can’t talk publicly about most of what is bothering me. (You knew that was coming.) I will say that I don’t anticipate any life tragedies as a result of where I am. It’s not like that. Objectively, everything is fine. Subjectively, I can do better—both acting and reacting—on multiple fronts.
I’m making peace with some things. I’m altogether relinquishing others. If you care in ten years, ask me about it then.
I made progress today. I’ll be back soon.