Nov 132013

The intelligent and aware need not fear the mobile sterilization squads in Bozekistan. If you are reading, it’s highly likely you are among this group.

Now it may be necessary to scrub a welfare-state fairy tale or two from a few of you. But after such, you will find Bozekistan a lovely and rewarding place to live, work, and play.

The list of offenses requiring sterilization shall be pretty clear. If you’ve got your perfectly operational vehicle at a dead stop in an uncongested merge lane, your baby-making days are likely finished. Zero tolerance on “your welcome.” You are done. Snip snip. Incremental Guy gets it too, thought I think enforcement on that one will have to be rather opportunistic. (Perhaps we shall encourage the people to spy and report on themselves, just in this one case. Heh.)

It occurred to me yesterday, though, that there is a class of offense that clearly indicates a damaged mind, but that might not quite rise to the level of immediate mandatory sterilization.

In Bozekistan, a first offense of placing an 8 upside down shall warrant a brief home visit and interview.
We have opportunities to put numbers on things. There are mailboxes, and signs in front of businesses, and boat registration numbers, and so forth. Consider that such opportunities tend to be deliberate and unstressful. You’re not going to be trying to do it at gunpoint, or in a hurricane. That being the case, managing to apply an 8 upside down is troubling indeed.

Do I just need to say it explicitly? Maybe I do, so search engines can find it:

When you apply the numeral 8 to a surface, the larger end is the bottom.

Now some 8s are indeed horizontally symmetrical. You can’t place one of those upside down. When there is a difference, though, it’s never so subtle that it could be missed by anyone paying even moderate attention.

Be ever diligent, citizenry. Thank you.

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 Posted by at 9:26 am

  3 Responses to “I dream of a country where all of the 8s are right side up”

  1. There’s a typesetter in Virginia right now who is applauding. Loudly.

  2. Reading the post title, I thought you had some strange abhorrence of the infinity sign.

  3. Oh, the merging…I have to admit I’ve been guilty of that!

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