I wrote “rarely senselessly vulgar; frequently slightly tacky” early on in my blog’s life, and it’s still usually what I say when I’m asked to provide a blog description. I envisioned it mostly as a content warning, though I also liked the transposition of the syllable structure from the first phrase to the second. I thought it was a clever way to tell you up front that I might say “fuck,” but would try not to do so gratuitously.
Thing is, I don’t say “fuck” much anymore. I’ve sometimes written of the fact that I’ve never tried to be a different person online than I am in real life, and that I found it difficult not to question the motives of those who did. I don’t think it’s that. I think my change from the beginning to now represents an honest evolution in the way I do things, not that I was once pretending and now I’m not (or vice versa). I’d probably still call BoWilliams.com PG-13, but more for thematic reasons than the occasional profanity.
Still, without question, I’ve always written this blog to adults. I have only considered children stumbling upon it in terms of a combination of likelihood that they would do so, and relative severity of what they would find if they did, and have always been “societally” comfortable with what I put out there. Yet now I’m doing a lot of thinking about my own children reading it. (Thanks to a friend for germinating that seed.) It gives me great pause. My boys were 5 and 2 when I started this blog, and I never had a single thought of them reading it. (In October 2006, had I even any thought of this blog existing in 2012? Probably not.)
But it does. And now Nathan is 10. And though he is still tightly supervised online both at home and school, it won’t be long before he’ll have no trouble finding a free whirl at the web here and there. You know, it’s not that I can remember ever writing anything here I’m ashamed of. I just never considered the, say, 12- to 19-year-old version of my own son when writing. I’ve been through thoughts “out loud” here that I wouldn’t mind my adult son reading, but that might frighten or confuse him as an adolescent.
I’m certainly not so vain to imagine that my son can’t wait to get to an unsupervised terminal just so he can wade through Dad’s thoughts for the past several years. But this will be here, and at an idle moment, he’ll think of it. I’m pretty sure I don’t want that, and I’m also pretty sure there’s only one reasonable solution to it.
If you’re my age or close to it, odds are decent an Atari 2600 made a memorable pass through your childhood. Do you remember when you would play Combat or Air-Sea Battle (or a few others), that the scores would blink on and off with maybe 30 seconds remaining as a warning that the game was about to end? That motif has stayed with me. I’ll be in the middle of something—making an omelet, doing the taxes, racing the dark to get the grass cut—and think “oops, the scores just started blinking. Better wrap this thing.”
I think that—for this BoWilliams.com, in its current instantiation—the scores just started blinking.
You might also like:
- What to do with past posts that don’t fit anymore?
I started this blog one night in October 2006, nearly on a whim. I mean, it was like I did the dishe… - A seven-year blogger reflects on growing, and changing, in public
I started BoWilliams.com in October 2006, really on a whim. I was sitting in the living room, and ha… - Back end blogging madness
I’m sorry BoWilliams.com has been erratic. If you’re reading this, congratulations. You got the site… - Is this an operational pause for BoWilliams.com?
I’m gassed, dudes and dolls. I just don’t have much in the tank for BoWilliams.com these days. (I’m … - Five years of BoWilliams.com!
BoWilliams.com is five years old today! Wow, I can’t believe it. This is the 1,824th post I’ve made….
Man, just when I discovered your blog, the stinkin’ blinkin’! Just hit the reset button on that 2600 — I’ve done it many times before — but don’t lose the value of this property by removing its content. (It doesn’t sound like you’re going to do so, but just in case you get an itch to “erase”: don’t!)
BTW do you backup your blog regularly?
Harold, something shall happen here for sure. I’m reconsidering my charter, not checking out.
And for past posts, of course I would archive, not delete.
I dunno. You do what you want, it’s your space and your time writing that’s what’s at stake here. To that end, I can’t tell you what to do.
I will say this much: insofar as I can remember, there’s never been anything on your blog that I would have hidden had La Principessa wandered by. You have a way of keeping it “G” that I don’t. (Alas, the dilemma of writing like I speak.)
However, there is also something important about keeping it as is. I cannot tell you how many times over the last five years that I wished he had written down his observations. We often joked that he could have written a book. He never did. The stories were good, but what I miss is his insight, and the way it was delivered. What he really felt vs. the public persona. He often shielded us from his fears, select experiences, or what really angered him. He had good, deep seated reasons, I’m sure, but as I grew into adulthood I wish that door had been open as well.
Anyhoo… it might seem the thing to “prune” the way things are done around here for the time being, but it’s this broad’s opinion that it’s not necessary. And who knows: what you deem offputting or confusing to a select audience may actually open up some avenues of deep discussion for all parties concerned.
My $.02, adjusted for inflation.
Kelly, I appreciate your thoughtful response, and I’ll consider it carefully.
Well, just remember that I’m just as full of crap as the next person….
Kelly, to my knowledge you and I have never stood in the same room, and yet I’d trust your judgment on any number of things before that of any number of people with whom I have shared a room. 🙂
Bo…I haven’t read everything on this blog…but I’ve been following for some time. And I gotta say…I haven’t seen anything that I’d be concerned about letting your kids see. I haven’t read anything on this site that I wouldn’t let Mileena read (of course she’s 16, not 10).
As the father of 10 and 7 year-olds I can definitely get where you’re coming from. From a purely selfish standpoint; however, I have enjoyed reading your blog and getting to know you “again” through this medium. I hope that you will continue to disseminate your thoughts in some form because I think you have a gift with words. Just sayin’…
Marianne and Dave, I’m going to do something at BoWilliams.com just as regularly as I ever have, which means four or five times a week. No worries. Thanks for your wonderful compliments.