I’ve had a stressful week of the sort I haven’t had in years.
The overwhelming majority of it is a direct result of reflections in my own mind, and has little tenable connection to actual events.
On the way home today I considered for the first time how appallingly egotistical that is.
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“Did I go to work today?” “What time is it?” “Is anyone else here?” Those are the thoughts I had yes…
And now you’re going to read this:
http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/conditions/10/11/ep.work.stress/index.html
I had a friend once that told me how he had been on a really bad blind double date and had decide to “quit the date”. He didn’t leave. He just quit focusing his energy on trying to make the bad date work and instead focused on having a pleasant time with the other couple.
At the time, I was having a difficult time with my boss (a problem I was not familiar with since I’ve always had good relationships with my bosses) and I decided to apply his philosophy. So, I “fired my boss” figuratively. I looked at my work, decided to concentrate on what I thought was important, work hard and cut my contact with my boss to an absolute minimum… including purposely not writing a status report. I figured if this boss was going to fuss at me no matter what I did, I would at least control the amount and the content as much as possible. It was a calculated decision. Since I was “matrixed” to another group and my end “customer” was happy, there was only so much the boss could do to me on a review. Plus, I figured I had several years worth of happy bosses and good reviews that could counter one bad review.
The punch line was that when I quit “struggling” with this person and constantly trying to defend myself, the problem went away (I got a good review and we worked well together on a later project). I really didn’t change how I did my job. I just changed my approach to this person. At any rate, it was a big “lessons learned” moment for me… fix what YOU can fix and let the other sort itself out.
Hey Lea, when you are done helping Bo, can you come over and make me feel better? I got some crap going on at work, and you give good advice.
Wow. Lea DOES have that figured out. Listen to her, Bo…
Saintseester – Sure! It’ll cost you a margarita and you have to sign a waiver not to sue me if my advice doesn’t work! 😉